Sausage Sandwich

Don't mess with something that works. Usually good advice. However, I was fresh out of the small donut loaves that I usually add to my regular frozen banana delight last night. I substituted - gasp - a cookie. Now this type of cookie is actually very tasty especially with a cup of tea, earl gray, hot. But on to the plot.

I woke up a few minutes ago and realized I had been privy to one of those dreams you tell your friends. Not actually, but it is rather un-normal for me to remember dreams when I awake so I was pretty excited. In retrospect, I wish that I had not remembered this one.

The setting is a room that looks strikingly similar to my bedroom at home for the first 16 years I lived there except bigger, much bigger. Anyhow, the basic story line is that my parents leave the house for a day to go adopt two new kids. Before they leave they decide to give us boys a pool. The pool was in my bedroom. Now I'm not exactly sure if this took place ten years ago, but brother number four was not a character. Yes, I'm pretty sure that the other three bros were also pretty young. Number two's voice was still somewhere between the troposphere and the stratosphere.

A pool is a great idea, but we got fish to go along with it! It is a really strange feeling to be sitting on the edge of your bed (underwater of course) and have a manta ray come up and start nuzzling you. I think our prize possession was an enormous killer whale. Not every kid on the block has a personal whale in their very own bedroom.

Probably the bulk of the dream happened at this point with the three musketeers up to some pre-double digit nonsense, but I don't remember exactly. What is still pretty vivid is the moment our killer whale did something unusual. He made this wicked little about face and in the same motion devoured one of our mantas. That didn't make me feel secure to be sitting in the same water with a ferocious killer. But my pre-pubescent brothers convinced me there was nothing to worry about. And there wasn't.

Until two minutes later when the whale tenderly put a brother's leg in his mouth and started heading down to the bottom of the pool. Fortunately, we were able to hoist the brother back onto the two feet of 'land' we had around the perimeter of the room. The next little while saw all three of us have our lives nearly taken as our orca found great pleasure in Elliott™ meat. (After regaining consciousness I noticed striking similarities between the whale attacks and Deep Blue Sea, which I saw for the first time while staying in a hotel room with the same two brothers.)

For some reason the water level started to go down and as it did, the room shrank back to normal size. When everything was gone and the carpet was just a bit wet I wondered what had happened to our whale. My query was fielded by the marine expert amongst us. He said that killer whales are like sponges. When there is lots of water, they are big. But when there isn't lots of water, they stay pretty small. Our viciously friendly whale probably died someplace in my old closet.

Round about then, the parents returned with two new kids in tow. The little boy was maybe ten months old and had a really weird name - E-Ka!

So there we have the blog entry that shouldn't have been written. Remember: when you eat your frozen banana, only use coconut flavored donuts.